Poagao's Journal

Absolutely Not Your Monkey

Sep 01 2007

Poagao’s Rules of Badminton

20 things I must remember not to do when playing badminton with pug-nosed women:

1. Talk shit about other players

2. Feign boredom, yawn a lot and watch other games

3. Talk to the birdie as if it were a person

4. Talk to other players as if they weren’t

5. Wander off the court

6. Run into the net

7. Run into the netposts

8. Make other people pick up the birdie

9. Hit my foot with my racket

10. Hit other players with my racket

11. Hit anything but the birdie with my racket

12. Whistle or sing

13. Roll my eyes whenever opponents call an out ball.

14. Say things like “Merry Christmas, asshole, ’cause that last serve was a gift!”

15. Say about other players’ really good shots, “That was just too easy. I couldn’t be bothered.”

16. Throw my racket into the air and catch it

17. Throw my racket into the air and not catch it

18. Throw my racket into the air and accidentally hit someone else with it

19. Throw my racket into the air and intentionally hit someone else with it

20. Laugh maniacally

posted by Poagao at 5:36 am  

No Comments »

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a comment