Why I frequently change jobs: Reason #289: One …
Why I frequently change jobs: Reason #289:
One reason I like to have the window blinds open is that it provides light from somewhere other than our office lights, which shine directly down and make my monitor, which hails all the way from the era of the mighty IBM AT, virtually unreadable. All of the guys in my cubicle agree, so we generally keep the lights off and rely on any stray light the Vampires happen to accidentally allow to leak through the blinds.
So today when one of the administrative clones came in and turned on the lights we of course protested. She explained that this was the directive from the Big Boss, since a Fengshui Expert had suggested that we keep all the lights on all the time for the best, highest quality fengshui. Apparently we were getting economy-class fengshui before, the kind you get from the back of a Walmart store. Personally, I think it’s a clever ploy by the electric company, which probably pays fengshui experts to go around telling people to leave their lights on all the time. Remember, this is the same management that told us that they would cut our annual bonuses by half because of a mythical profit loss. And nobody complained then (except for me), so I doubt the sheep will have any problem at all with spending a shitload of extra money on electricity for good fengshui rather than actually unfreezing the salaries of its employees.
In any case, I told the clone that I would be happy to switch monitors with the Big Boss, and then we could see if she still wanted all the lights on all the time after trading in her nice, big monitor for my little crappy one, but the clone just stared at me. There was an awkward silence, and you know exactly what happened next: The Big Boss, of course, was in the next cubicle over and caught the entire exchange. The reason I know this is that, as she walked past on her way back to the elevator, she shot a dark, warning glance in my direction. I am not one of the emasculated, hand-clapping yes-men that tend to flourish at this and many other office environments, so I think I wasn’t entirely popular in the first place, but this does not bode well for my continued employment here. Fortunately for me, perhaps, is the fact that another job opportunity has come up recently. Given my track record at the institution in question, however, I don’t think I have any reason to get my hopes up over it. It seems like everything is suddenly up in the air, which is what life is like, actually. We only forget this essential fact after being lulled into a false sense of security by staying in the same situation for too long.
Oh, well. At least it’s Friday.
I’ve been feeling guilty about not liking Hitchcock’s Vertigo, so last night I watched To Catch a Thief and was immediately won over. If there’s anything classier or more elegant than Cary Grant and Grace Kelly exchanging witty, unscripted banter as they whiz along a sunny mediterranean road in a classic Sunbeam Mark Alpine in 1955, I don’t know what it is. With delicious dialogue, stunning scenery and, uh, exquisite editing, the film felt remarkably light and snappy for its age, and more than makes up for the distress and confusion wrought by Vertigo.
And it’s Friday.
