It’s pouring outside. I can just see my motorcycle…
It’s pouring outside. I can just see my motorcycle helmet filling up with water….I don’t mind, though; I’m too lazy to carry it around with me all the time. This is one thing I’ve noticed: foreigners in Taiwan all carry their motorcycle helmets around with them. Why is this? Are they afraid of theft? Do they not enjoy the lurvely feeling of water dripping down their necks? Are they trying to show off? Showing off the fact that one rides a scooter in the country with the world’s most scooters would be kind of silly, though.
One time Harry and I were at a restaurant, and we saw an unattended table with a motorcycle helmet on it. “I bet that’s a foreigner,” I said, but Harry was skeptical. “Not just that, but I’ll bet it’s a white guy with a Chinese girl. Harry shook his head at these seemingly wild guesses, but it turned out I was right. Probability was on my side, since it seems that many of the white guys in this country are accompanied by really loud Chinese girls. It’s like a sort of law. “Excuse me, sir, but I must ask that you produce a valid ARC (Alien Residence Certificate) and ACG (Accompanying Chinese Girl).”
Tom proposed to me his theory this afternoon that Asian Bastard(now defunct), Drunkenstyle, Angry Asian Man and Little.Yellow.Different. were all the same guy, i.e. “Drunken.Angry.Asian.Bastard.” Kind of like GM brands…essentially the same cars, but packaged differently…hmmm. I’ll have to think about this one.
On a similar note, he also suspects that all the A-listers live in a house in Pacific Heights. I can imagine what it’s like when they decide to add a blog to the exalted “Blogs of Note” list:
Meanwhile, back at A-list Manor…
Meg: I saw a blog today.
Ev: Oh, really?
Meg: Yeah. It was…strange. Just this guy, talking about all of these things and people. I had no idea what it was about.
Ev: Wow.
Meg: Yeah.
Ev: We’d better notify Jason! Maybe he can make something out of it. And now, Meg…
Meg: Yeah?
Ev: To the Blogsofnotemobile!
(they slide down a fireman’s pole to their computers, don tights and capes and, in a most heroic fashion, update the Blogs of Note. Enter 60’s-style music and wacky credits)